Ready or Not (Parody Style)/Plot
Young brothers Jonathan and Flint Lockwood are seen running through the halls of a house. Flint, the older brother, leads Jonathan around the house and finally has Jonathan hide in a closet when a man approaches him begging Flint to help him. Flint looks at him for a moment before yelling "He's in here!" The man runs but is stopped by members of Flint and Jonathan's family in masks and with different weapons. One of them shoots the man in the chest and a woman in a wedding dress pleads for them to stop. The man is picked up off the ground as a woman takes off her mask and tells Flint he did a good job, and the woman in the wedding dress enters a room no longer seeming sad as the man is dragged in there. The door of the room then shuts behind them. Thirty years later, Jonathan has returned home to marry his fiancée, Mavis, a former foster child eager to finally have a family. On their wedding night, he tells her that, as tradition, every outside addition to the family must play a game. Mavis has to draw a random card, and the game they have to play will be written there. The family includes Jonathan, his alcoholic brother, Flint, and drug-addicted sister, Marguax Kneedler; their father, Professor Robert Callaghan and mother, Captain Chantel DuBois; Flint's snobbish wife, Vicky; Marguax's whiny husband, Wally; and the sombre Aunt Regine Le Haut. It is explained that their ancestor, Victor Le Domas, made a deal with a man named the Beast. The Beast would build the Johnston fortune in exchange for the Johnstons observing this tradition. Mavis draws a card labeled "Hide and Seek." Unaware of the truth, she hides while the Johnstons arm themselves with antique weapons to hunt her down. When Mavis witnesses Marguax accidentally killing one of the maids believing it to be her, Jonathan confesses that the "hide and seek" card is the only game that requires the family to kill the recipient. They believe that if Mavis survives until dawn, the entire family will die, as per the agreement with the Beast. He kept the truth from Mavis, knowing she would leave him if she knew. The last time someone pulled that card was thirty years ago when Regine's husband was killed. Shocked, scared, and angry, Mavis becomes determined to survive. She is discovered by Flint, who is disillusioned with the bloody family tradition and gives her a head start. To prevent his family tracking Mavis, Jonathan destroys the security monitors before being restrained by Flint and Callaghan. Mavis escapes the mansion and hides in the barn, only to be shot in the hand by Marguax's young son, Brandon. Furious, she knocks Brandon out, but accidentally falls into a pit filled with the decaying corpses of the previous sacrifices. She climbs out, though not without more wounds, and is pursued by the butler, Kingpin. She fights him and escapes in his car, but the car is quickly reported stolen and shut down. Kingpin catches up and tranquilizes her. While being driven back, Mavis awakens and attacks Kingpin, causing the car to crash. However, she is captured again and restrained on the symbol of a pentagon as the family prepares to sacrifice her. They drink from a ceremonial cup and start to vomit blood. Flint releases Mavis, revealing he non-lethally poisoned its contents. Vicky, however, shoots Flint in the throat, causing him to bleed to death; after pistol-whipping Vicky, Mavis thanks Flint for helping her. Looking for an exit, Mavis is cornered by Callaghan, she bludgeons him with an oil lamp, and inadvertently starts a fire. DuBois attacks Mavis; having had enough, Mavis snaps and bludgeons DuBois to death with the Beast's wooden game box. Jonathan finds Flint's body before finding Mavis and his mother. Realizing that Mavis no longer trusts him and will not be with him after all this, Jonathan subdues her. The group hails Satan as Jonathan prepares to stab her. At the last moment, Mavis twists, taking the stab to her shoulder and freeing herself. Dawn breaks, but when nothing happens, the family believes their tradition was a lie, and all of this was for nothing. However, Regine suddenly explodes. One by one, the remaining family members explode in bloody messes. Jonathan pleads for Mavis's forgiveness out of cowardice; she rebukes him, and he explodes. As the mansion burns, Mavis sees the Beast in the fire, nodding in apparent approval, and realizes the pact was real. As the police arrive, Mavis sits on the patio steps, exhausted and relieved, her wedding dress turned red from blood, and smokes a cigarette. When asked about what happened, she simply replies “In-laws”. Category:Horror Category:Transcripts